The usual pattern, chemo doc visit on 9/13 and chemo on 9/14. Bad news at the doctor that she may be leaving the area. I really, really like both my cancer doctors, and am especially uplifted by my chemo doc (AKA Dr. #7). So I need to find a new chemo doctor, who can work with my surgeon (Dr. #6) and keep treatment moving forward.
Chemo was quick, I chose to schedule the appointment in the afternoon since this is the best I am feeling each cycle. Why ruin a good morning with chemo, now that it's only 2-2.5 hours instead of 6-8 hours let's delay it to the afternoon. Made sense at the time, and then I didn't get my ass moving so I didn't do much in the morning anyway. Well, shit happens. Maybe next round I'll use that time. I did also want the morning available so I could work if the opportunity arose.
The first week after chemo isn't as tiring physically as the first drugs, but it's mentally draining. I end up depressed and down on days 3-4. I try to manage the depression and the anxiety with planning, mostly it works OK but I'm still not as positive as I am later in the cycle. And it helps that I'm feeling better later in the cycle, but that doesn't seem to be all of it. I have been sleeping well in general without the 20 hour sleep day of the first drugs.
My anxiety is the worst after I've had a scan and don't have the results, so I moved my next scan from Friday to Monday morning. There should still be time to get results, but I'm actually less concerned about the results and appointment than the anxiety if I have the test on Friday. Last time we did that the weekend was a black hole of depression.
I haven't made one pelagic this year. It didn't help that there was only one Texas pelagic, and it was the day after chemo, 16 hours, and I was still unsteady on my legs with the neuropathy. Oh, and seriously troubled by heat. At least I didn't miss any megas, but I don't begrudge them the rarities! I have booked flights - but may still bail - for Debi Shearwater's last pelagic trip. I would love to get out on Monterey Bay.
Thanks to all who have reached out to me!
Onwards.
